Monday, May 15th 2000:  Monday Night Mutilation
Card #4 - Match #3

Samantha, Carmine vs. Nadia, Karen.

Authour:  Jeff Davidson [Assistant CEO]
Match:  IronWoman.
Rules:  Standard, 60 Minute, most pins win.
Titles: None.
Commentators: Colburn, McBride.


McBride: Alright! It’s time to bring on the ladies!

Colburn: Try and keep that bulge in your pants to yourself please.

McBride: (quiet voice) At least I can still get a bulge.

Colburn: What was that?

McBride: I said it looks like we are ready to introduce the first 
        wrestler.

Colburn: Oh, right.

(The havoc viewscreen flickers on and we see Gothic.)

Gothic: Greetings all. The next match is going to be a Tornado Tag Team
       IronWoman match. For all those of you who don’t know what the hell 
       that is, I’ll explain.  Two teams, no tags. At the start of the
       match we will have Nadia versus Alena, and Karen versus Samantha. 
       After 30 minutes they will switch partners and we will have Nadia 
       versus Samantha, and Karen versus Alena. The team with the most 
       pins at the end wins.  Now that you all know the rules, let’s bring
       out the wrestlers!

(Alter Mann by Rammstein comes onto the speakers and Nadia emerges from 
 the back. She blows the audience a kiss and then proceeds down to the
 ring. The men in the audience start making cat-calls and whistling. 
 Nadia walks over to a corner in the ring and then leans against the
 turnbuckle.)

Colburn: She seems pretty calm.

McBride: Yeah, but with her skills what does she really have to worry 
        about?

Colburn: Alena.

McBride: Oh right. I forgot about their first match.

(Alena walks out from the back wearing a dark red robe. "Falling Away
 From Me" by Korn begins playing and the entire entrance goes red and
 starts to pour smoke and flames.  She walks through the flames and her
 robe catches fire and burns away quickly, leaving only the red jumpsuit 
 underneath. A pair of fountains on either side of the ramp start gushing 
 out what looks like blood all over her. She walks through the liquid 
 archway and gets into the ring. Nadia and her shake hands and then 
 proceed to their respective corners.)

Colburn: Do you think that’s really blood?

McBride: Of course it isn’t, stupid. Do you have any idea how many 
        animals they’d have to kill to get all that blood?

Colburn: Or just put all the blood that gets spilled during these matches
        into a container and keep it.

McBride: Dude, that’s sick.

(Trigger Happy by Weird Al comes over the speakers and DAND drives out 
 onto the stage on his bike, with Samantha on the back. He stops and
 Samantha jumps off. She waves at him and he nods back then drives his 
 bike away. Samantha walks down the ramp and then goes halfway around
 the ring, giving people high-fives.  She then climbs into the ring and 
 shakes hands with the rest of the women.)

McBride: You know, DAND has some really nice bikes.

Colburn: I’m surprised you were looking at the bike and not something else.

McBride: Like what?

Colburn: Nevermind.

McBride: ...Whatever.

(The Seasons of the Abyss come onto the speakers and Karen walks out 
 from the back carrying her chair.  She walks down the ramp and into 
 the ring, leaving the chair by the steel steps. Nadia nods at her and 
 she nods back.)

Gothic: As you can plainly see,  our commentators have returned, and have 
       assured me that they can politely handle themselves, therefore, 
       against my better judgment they have been reinstated for the time 
       being.  Alright, let's get started.

(On the viewscreen, Gothic’s face is replaced by the image of a
 scoreboard and a countdown clock. The clock is at 60 minutes.)

McBride: Alright, to catch all the pins we have two refs in the ring now.
        And from what I understand, pins can be made anywhere in the 
        immediate ring area, or on the stage.

Colburn: This is just so the audience doesn’t miss anything as our 
        viewscreen has been taken over by that clock.

(The bell rings and both Nadia and Karen run at their respective
 opponents. Karen leaps onto Samantha and starts bashing her head into 
 the ring, while Nadia goes for a spear on Alena and gets monkey flipped
 over the ropes.)

Colburn: They’re not wasting any time tonight folks.

McBride: Although Karen’s attack was a little more successful than
        Nadia’s.

Colburn: Are you so sure about that? Take a look.

(Outside of the ring, Nadia lands on her feet and reaches into the ring 
 to grab Alena’s ankles. Alena falls down and Nadia drags her outside. 
 Meanwhile, Samantha rolls over on top of Karen and starts punching away 
 rapidly. Karen kicks her off easily and gets up. Nadia now picks up
 Alena and gives her a suplex.)

Colburn: See? Told ya. Nadia has some strategy going on here.

McBride: Well, I guess she learned from last time.

(Karen finds a break between punches and pushes Samantha off. Both women
 stand up quickly and tie up.  On the outside, Alena recovers from the 
 suplex fairly quickly and gives Nadia a snapmare by the hair. She 
 follows it up with a senton splash and goes for a cover, but only gets
 a one count. In the ring, Karen wins out in the tie up and whips Samantha
 into the ropes. Karen goes for a drop kick but Samantha holds onto the
 ropes and Karen falls to the ground.)

McBride: Damn, a missed pin, then a missed dropkick.

Colburn: Well, the pin was a little early, but that dropkick was a good 
        idea. Right up until Samantha held the ropes.

(Alena picks up Nadia and goes for a roundhouse but Nadia ducks under and 
 spears Alena to the ground.  Nadia jumps onto the apron and gives Alena
 an elbow drop and goes for a cover, but only gets two and a half.
 Meanwhile, Karen gets up and Samantha drop kicks her back down to the
 ground. Samantha hits her with an asai moonsault and covers, but gets 
 only two. She picks up Karen and does a very sloppy fall forward 
 powerbomb. She covers again and gets the three this time.)

Colburn: Chalk one up for Alena and Samantha.

McBride: That was a messy powerbomb, but it did the trick.

Colburn: I’m surprised Samantha could even pull off a move like that. 
        What with her size and all.

McBride: Yeah, she is a small one isn’t she?

(Nadia picks up Alena and kicks her in the gut. She then gives her a snap
 german suplex into a bridge pin. She gets a two count but Alena kicks
 her off. Nadia rolls and then gets up quickly. Alena stands, but before 
 she can turn around, Nadia gets her into the Peacemaker. Nadia holds it
 for a while then lets go and goes for a cover. She gets the three, but 
 Alena kicks out immediately after. Meanwhile, in the ring, Samantha goes 
 for another cover, but Karen kicks out even before the first count. 
 Karen rolls away and stands up.  Samantha goes for a bulldog, but Karen 
 ducks and then pushes her into the ropes. Samantha gets tangled in the 
 ropes and Karen pulls her out and gives her a piledriver. She goes for 
 the cover and gets the three.)

McBride: Ow! That had to hurt!

Colburn: No kidding. I never expected a move like that from Karen.

McBride: I never expected that from any of them.

(Karen goes for another cover but only gets two. Samantha doesn’t get
 up however, and Karen gets her into an armbar. Samantha reaches the 
 ropes and the ref ends the hold. Samantha slowly gets up and Karen 
 bounces off the far ropes. She runs at Samantha and clotheslines her 
 over the ropes. Meanwhile, Alena surprises Nadia with a quick leg sweep.
 Nadia falls and Alena starts stomping away at her. Nadia dodges most of
 the stomps, but Alena then grabs her legs and puts her into a mexican 
 surfboard. Alena keeps the hold on for a few seconds and then tosses 
 Nadia into the security rail. She then climbs back into the ring and
 waits for Nadia to get up. Nadia slowly gets up and Alena backflips over
 the ropes. She lands on Nadia’s shoulders and twists her legs around 
 Nadia’s neck. She then brings her down onto the railing in a modified 
 Ultimate Neck Grip. Nadia is out of it and Alena covers and gets the 
 three.)

Colburn: Whoa! Is that legal?

McBride: Just barely. It looks like Nadia is pretty much unconcious from 
        that move. Hey, what’s this? Alena looks a bit concerned for 
        Nadia.

Colburn: Nadia isn’t moving a single muscle. You think Alena killed her?

(Alena shakes Nadia but there is no reaction. She tries again, but still
 no reaction.  On the other side of the ring, Karen gives Samantha a snap
 suplex and covers her.  She gets the three. She goes for another pin, but
 the ref on the other side calls for the bell. Karen gets up with a 
 puzzled look on her face and then she sees the medics heading for Nadia. 
 Samantha manages to get up and she slowly walks over to see what’s
 happened.)

Colburn: Oh, man. This is something you never want to see.

McBride: Talk about it. Nadia’s neck might be broken from that move.

Colburn: Jeez, look at Alena, she’s beside herself. She’s almost 
        in tears.

McBride: I think this match is over.  

(An ambulance drives into the arena and more medics come out with a 
 stretcher. They quickly run over to Nadia and check her over. One of 
 them has a neckbrace and they place it on her neck. She is lifted onto
 the stretcher and they slowly take her to the ambulance.)

Colburn: Let’s hope she isn’t too badly injured.

McBride: Man, I don’t know. That was some pretty harsh impact on her
        neck.

Colburn: Don’t say that. Nadia is pretty tough, I think she just landed 
        a little too hard on her neck.

McBride: I guess. Either way, Alena seems pretty distressed. I think
        she’s gonna go with her to the hospital.

Colburn: Man, first her husband gets hospitalized and now one of her 
        friends has been injured.

McBride: It hasn’t been a good last little while for her at all.

Colburn: Well, as you all probably know. The match is kinda over. The 
        good news for Nadia, when and if she wakes up, is that her team
        won. Karen got that last pin in just before the bell.

McBride: Kind of a bitter-sweet ending for Nadia.

(Nadia is loaded into the ambulance and Alena climbs in with her. The 
 doors close and the ambulance drives off. Karen looks a bit 
 uncomfortable and grabs her chair and walks to the back. Samantha
 catches her breath and makes her way to the back.)

McBride: Our prayers go out to Nadia right now.

Colburn: She’ll pull through, she’s a tough girl.

McBride: I hope you’re right, man, I hope you’re right.