Monday, Jun 12th 2000: Monday Night Mutilation Card #8 - Match #1 Dark Angel of Death vs. Chrono Authour: Alexander Michael Quinn (LimousineDriver) [President] Match: Hell in the Cell w/ Weapons. Rules: None. Titles: None. Commentators: Iaian McBride, James Colburn ______________________________________________________________________ McBride: All right! All set up for another night of mutilation! Colburn: It will definitely live up to it's name tonight, what a line-up! McBride: Yeah, two great matches today, but first we gotta do the News and the Highlights. Colburn: Right. Okay first we have the News; Iaian, what's going on with the President? McBride: To be honest, James, I haven't figured it out yet. He's been acting rather strangely for the past couple of days...maybe he just finally snapped? Colburn: Man, sounds tough for Alena, I hear she's scared just to be in the same room with the President. McBride: Yeah, he's been a lot more violent lately, we don't know what's wrong. Colburn: And now with the tagteam with Dark Angel, of all the people in the world! McBride: I don't know, but I'm worried about Alex. Colburn: You two really are good friends, aren't you? McBride: Dude, I don't--Well, in the highlights, last Wednesday was pretty brutal! Colburn: (shrugs) Yeah, the first match was with Alena Carmine Vs. Nadia Drozdova. McBride: Yeah, I hear Nadia won't fight men, but that means she won't compete in boiler-room free for all's! How's she ever gonna get the World Title with that attitude? Colburn: I don't know, but I don't think she even cares. McBride: Well, at least the Chinese Training match was pretty cool. Colburn: Yeah, but I don't think it would work with any other wrestlers but those two. McBride: Not a chance, man the moves on those ladies; wow! Colburn: The fastest humans alive, they must be! McBride: Oh yeah, without a doubt, man they sure do have moves. Colburn: I mean, remember just the first move? Two reversals in one second! Holy s*it, definitely one for the books! McBride: What about the Boiler Room Free-for-all?! Colburn: Man, I just remember the last two minutes between Chrono and Dark Angel. McBride: What a treat, we get to see the outcome of that tonight, because last Wednesday, Dark Angel left...I think he ran. Colburn: I don't know about that. He creeps me out, he must have something up his sleeve. McBride: Remember when Alena knocked out DAND? Colburn: That was way before, but yeah, that was pretty funny. Guess all the wrestlers forgot about her. McBride: Yeah...Hmmm, hey do you know why we aired so late? Colburn: ...what? McBride: Look at the TV schedule here. Colburn: What? ...weird, we aired on Thursday? But it was recorded on Wednesday... (A chair is brought up to the table, and we see the LimousineDriver sit down in his new costume made specifically for Tagteam matches [Check the Roleplays, it's a kung-fu style outfit].) Quinn: I think I can answer that. Colburn: Urp! H-hi, Mr....uh, sir. McBride: Hi Alex. Quinn: Hello James, Iaian. Colburn: (Aside to McBride) Is he still nuts? McBride: (shrugs) Quinn: Hi, I think I'm gonna do some guest announcing tonight. Colburn: B-be my guest, sir. Hehe, okay. McBride: All right, James, you can sit this one out. Colburn: Thank you God! I-I mean, uh oh. Bye! (runs away from Quinn) Quinn: Man, what's his problem? McBride: Dude, I don't know, I think he's scared of you. Quinn: Smart Man. McBride: So why did we air so late? Quinn: Well, because I got arrested. McBride: What?! Quinn: Yeah, me along with all the other Fed Execs, including Gothic. McBride: What the Hell for? Quinn: Well, they caught on that we didn't use special effects in the show. McBride: Oh sh*t, we're getting shut down by the government because the show is too offensive?! Quinn: No, I didn't say that. McBride: Well, what are you saying? Quinn: We got to the court, and it took me a mere week, but I managed to keep us alive on a few channels, but now we've been moved to pay-per-view channels because of the extreme violence. McBride: I'm surprised we didn't get shutdown completely. Quinn: Well, even though we aren't too popular on normal channels, our ratings were through the roof outside of North America. Hell, we're one of the highest rated wrestling Feds in the world outside of the US and Canada! McBride: Are you serious?! Quinn: Yeah, that's why we've been declared International property. McBride: What?! I thought we'd have to move the arena! Quinn: Nah, but we now have Diplomatic Immunity. McBride: Oh my God. Quinn: (smiles) Yep, that's right. McBride: Are you telling me that all of our operations are now legal?! Quinn: Yes, plus we have absolutely no law. Not even for murder. McBride: Holy sh*t, that's really gonna cut our employment. Quinn: Are you kidding?! Everyone loves it! Hell, we're still running full operations. McBride: No one quit?! Quinn: Nope, isn't it great? I can kill and get away with it. McBride: Um, you mean, anyone can kill and get away with it. Quinn: .....yeah...that's what I meant. McBride: Okay, well I think everyone is itching to get started now, the cage is ready and everything. Just one question, what are you really doing here, Alex? Quinn: I'm just guaranteeing success. McBride: Say what? Quinn: If Dark Angel fails to succeed, I'll kill Chrono for him. McBride: Um...kill? Quinn: ...... McBride: Uh, okay...let's get started? (The viewscreen flickers and we see Gothic standing in the dark. He looks out among the crowd, and smiles...a bit too strangely.) Gothic: Okay, I'm happy to see that our turnouts are increasing in numbers. First to arise for this Hell in the Cell with Weapons, is a man who is always punctual: Chrono. (Lights go completely light blue, and the music starts. A watch appears on the big screen and the hands are spinning fast. He walks out slowly. He raises his hands to the air and lasers start shooting off. He walks towards the ring slowly then jumps into the ring. He brandishes a standard katana [as far as this author knows].) Gothic: And now, his executioner--ahem, his opponent (grins evilly): A personal favorite, Dark Angel! (Unforgiven comes over the speakers and the building is bathed in white light. Dark Angel walks out from the back carrying his double-edged scythe and wearing his cloak. He walks down and into the ring and stands in the middle. He then lets out a hellish scream and tears away his cloak. He brandishes a double-edged scythe, points opposite eachother.) Quinn: I really like that weapon of his, but it is so hard to defend against. McBride: Yeah, you nearly got it in the end. Quinn: The only man worthy of alliance. McBride: um...right. (Chrono stands there with his blade out towards Dark Angel, with him doing the same to Chrono.) McBride: Well, the wrestlers are ready to start. Strange, they were so mad at eachother before, only now to be hesitant. Quinn: Iaian, Dark Angel is waiting. McBride: Wait--what? Quinn: Don't you know anything about fights with weapons? Apparently they have both silently agreed to allow the defender to choose the style of fighting. McBride: Huh, I don't get it. Quinn: Just be quiet and watch. (Chrono takes his sword and sticks it in the ground, Dark Angel twists his scythe to be parellel to his own back.) Quinn: Okay, see? McBride: Huh? Quinn: Chrono is the defense, and has declared Free-style. McBride: Dude, I don't get this, did they decide to do this before the match? Quinn: I don't know. (Chrono and Dark Angel lunge at eachother, blade against blade. Chrono manages to parry the top scythe, but the other one is brought down quickly towards Chrono's knee. Chrono jumps and flips over Dark Angel, landing against the cage. Dark Angel turns around to face him, but it's too late, and Chrono jumps off the cage, putting Angel into a spinning neckbreaker. Angel hits the ground and picks up his scythe. Chrono takes his sword with both hands, ready for what Angel has in store. Angel just smiles and takes his scythe apart into two paired scythes.) McBride: Uh oh, looks like Angel has an ace up his sleeve. Quinn: Yeah, I guess now's a good time to say the fence is electrified. McBride: What?! Quinn: Well, like I said. No more rules...I can interfere anyway I wish to from now on. (Dark Angel begins to spin his scythes, and Chrono is desperately trying to parry the steel coming from every direction. He manages to be fast enough to hit them all back but it forces him back against the *now* reinforced cage.) Quinn: Wow, look at the sparks fly. McBride: Oh dear God. Quinn: Hahahaha!!! Medium well? McBride: I think the smell is gonna make me sick. (Chrono begins to smoke and his clothing catches on fire, fortunately for him, he has a conductor: his sword on Dark Angel's shoulder.) Quinn: Uh oh. (Both the wrestlers begin to shake violently and get sent off eachother with sparks flying; the cage has overloaded and most of the ring and wiring has caught fire.) McBride: But the cage is locked! They'll burn alive, if they aren't already dead! Quinn: Who cares? I can't get arrested anymore. McBride: Alex, you're making me sick. (The smoke begins to clear, and amidst the flames we see the two still duking it out, blade to blade, just as strongly as before, even though Chrono is fighting with only the bottom half of his outfit left unsinged. Dark Angel's clothing is now on fire, but we only hear him laughing as he begins to brand Chrono and take the severe punishment from both the fire and Chrono trying to stop him with his katana. Blood begins to drip and soak Angel's clothing, Chrono is now pushed back into the flames, trying to deal with his newly burnt flesh.) Quinn: See, what'd I tell you? They're alright. McBride: And what if they weren't?! Quinn: Oh well, guess I'd need a new partner. McBride: What the Hell is wrong with you? This has went from a match to a sadistic bloodfeud to satisfy your inhuman curiousities! Quinn: Oh, you're so right Iaian. Geeze I have seen the error of my ways... (Quinn takes his sword and severs Iaian's right index finger.) McBride: Oh my God! Alex, what's wrong with you?! Quinn: Gee, you know, they can reattach that in a few minutes, as long as you keep it on ice and hurry up. Now get the f*ck out of here! (McBride runs away, leaving a trail of blood behind him.) Quinn: Now where was I? Oh yes, drawing my own blood and watching those two draw eachother's. (He begins pricking his fingers with the tip of his dagger.) (Meanwhile, Chrono is trying to find a way out of the fire, knowing now that this match has been tampered with severely. Dark Angel doesn't care and is stabbing Chrono in both arms, laughing at him like he was a scared rabbit. Chrono finally gets pissed off and shoves his own blade through Dark Angel's leg. Dark Angel looks at the display and just picks up Chrono by the neck, who is trying to get his sword out of Dark Angel's leg. He tosses Chrono into the fire to watch him burn even more. Dark Angel, now aware of the loss of his own blood, begins to stumble a bit and falls to the ground.) Quinn: Now it's all a matter of which one will pass out first. Hopefully, it happens before the whole cell burns up...well, either way. Hehehe... (Dark Angel struggles to get away from the flames, stumbling over his knee. Chrono manages to get up, even with his now coterized arms, and manages to pick up his sword. He begins hacking away at the cell, trying to find a way out...or is he? He cuts the wires apart and begins to tear it off, even though they are still hot from the shorted electricity. Chrono then tosses them at Dark Angel as a distraction and comes down on Dark Angel's back with the hilt of his sword. Dark Angel manages to parry, trying to handle all of the pain and slashes a scythe across Chrono's chest, but not before Chrono managed to connect with the hilt elsewhere: in Angel's ribs.) Quinn: Hmm, let's see: Angel has broken ribs, a large wound in his leg, and 3rd degree burns. Chrono has a large chest wound, wounds in both arms, and severe burns as well. Hmmm...tough call. (Dark Angel stands up before Chrono and picks him up. Dark Angel then presses him into the cage, the electricity coursing between both of them. Angel just laughs as the blue arcs course through the bodies of both of them, causing the wounds to bleed so furiously that now the ring is nothing but black dust and blood. The entire cell falls apart from the surge against the wall, causing the entire ring to collapse on the wrestlers in a heap of electricity.) Quinn: Oh well, they're probably both dead by now. (A hand comes up through the rubble and Dark Angel emerges from the dust and blood, holding Chrono in one hand, who has now nearly bled to death. The scars across both are so large that no pure skin can be seen among the blood and burns [Author's Note: Critically Injured List for both of them for at least a couple of days. Dark Angel may wrestle later this evening, as long as paramedics have seen him.]) Quinn: Hmmm...look's like Angel wins. Too bad, I wanted to have some fun. Oh well, maybe next match. I'm sure we can patch up the two wrestlers within a few days. In the meantime, I think we'll have a one hour intermission before the next match. Just enough time for Iaian to get back with his new finger.